Kalau dengar cerita dari mulut orang lain, boleh jadi cerita tu berubah ubah struktur nya. Dari mulut A ke mulut B sampai ke telinga sendiri dari mulut K. Tak ke jauh.


Tapi kalau dah nampak dengan mata kepala sendiri, pandai2 lah.


Sebab tu tak boleh nak judge orang kalau tak tahu cerita disebaliknya.


Sebab tu selama ni aku hadap je orang kata aku macam macam.



"Kau ego tinggi doh dy". Ye ego aku tinggi.

"Kau ni keras kepala la". Ye kepala aku memang keras kalau lembik tak tahu mcm mana bentuk kepala aku.

"Kau ni macam ni la..macam tu laa". Ye aku macam ni, aku macam tu.



Tak boleh nak salah kan orang yang bercakap tu sebab diorang judge from what they see or hear. People judge. Tu kena tahu. Tak boleh nak melenting bila orang cakap macam tu.

Tapi kali ni kau dah tengok depan mata sendiri, aku takde nak memburuk burukkan orang. Kau dah nampak sendiri. Sekarang ni terpulang kau lah nak tengok aku as the bad guy or not.

Aku tak sampaikan cerita, aku tak mereka cerita.


Tapi cerita ni happen depan mata kau.


Terpulang kau nak percaya mata sendiri atau telinga.


Aku tak membuktikan aku betul, cuma jangan letak salah tu seratus peratus atas aku.


Bukan sekali dua aku kena macam ni. Kadang2 perasaan tu dah kebas. kata orang putih, numb.


Kalau boleh buka kan mata orang lain cerita sebenar.


Kalau boleh, aku taknak lah terima private message kata aku macam macam.

Siapa taknak back up member. Tapi kalau nak back up membuta tuli dengar cerita dari mulut orang lain ke apa tak boleh jugak. Kalau member sendiri memang dah salah, kau nak back up bagi menang, berdosa tahu. Menegak kan benda yang salah.


Jangan bercakap benda yang kosong. Cerita yang aku tulis ni, berisi.


Aku ni memang jenis dominan. Nak buat macam mana. Be it other's people fault, I'm the one who they see guilty.


Kalau jalan berdua dengan perempuan lain, orang ingat aku gay. dalam erti kata lain sejenis.


Mulut orang kita tak boleh nak tutup. Asalkan diri sendiri tahu macam mana, kisah apa orang lain cakap.


Kalau side aku macam ni orang dah cakap ego tinggi, keras kepala, degil, ketegaq ke apa,

You havent see my true colour yet, bro.


Ikutkan statistic aku dah lower the level apa yang orang cakap aku selama ni sebanyak 73 peratus.


Tahukah anda perangai aku yang sebenarnya telah menyebabkan perpecahan yang besar berlaku dalam hidup aku?

Takde undo button.


p/s: Untuk pengetahuan, aku dah menjangkau umur 20-an. Bukan dua belas. bukan dua.
      Beragak lah nak menipu ke apa, aku bukan otak kecil.

You know?

That feeling when you're supposed to feel something but you cant. not because you're heartless or cannot feel anything but it just that you shouldn't feel that way because people judge.


For example, you refuse to eat something because it doesnt taste good but you cant say anything but to eat it because people will say that you're picky.


Get what it means?


Or you got a cut, just a small cut but it hurts because its deep, but you cant brag about it because people will say that you're weak cse all they see it just a small cut but they cant see how deep it is.


See?



p/s: You know, sometimes you cant tell someone everything because some people judge, some people jump into conclusion, some people being on sides, some people dont even care, and the worst some people cant keep it. But for all I know, I'm glad that I have someone that understand. 



Enough said.



#skypingwithlynn♥

Macam macam

There's one time, masa aku period pain yang teramat sangat sampai berpeluh peluh tak boleh tido and pain killer pun dah hbs so aku ajak dia pegi seven-e. On our way he was driving so fast and I was like "weh rilek ahh, asal bawak laju? aku sakit perut je pun. bukan nya nak bersalin". Then I burst into laughing. He did too. He's afraid that I couldnt bear the pain so dia bawak laju so that cepat sampai dapat beli ubat and kurangkan sakit.

To be honest, I feel so blessed having him in my life. Seeing his worried and concern face could blew the pain away. well not literally but it could ease the pain at least. However, we shouldnt neglect our safety and put it behind. Safety first. Memang lah emergency, tapi keselamatan lagi penting. Nanti tak pasal2 from sakit senggugut yang boleh heal dalam sejam dua lepas makan ubat jadi lebih teruk. 

p/s: Its the little things that count. Though he just bought me painkillers and mineral water, but he did taking care of me. Thank you :) Is there someone else who did the same to you? Well, appreciate!

Awkward#nowplaying

LITTLE THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY #1

1) Had tea break with love. We ate ice cream. Not literally together cse after I finish eating then only he showed up. However we still had a very good time.


2) We draw  fake ring on our finger and took bunch of pictures and change our twitcon immediately.


3) We had this deeper conversation about favorite color, how do we sleep at night, and favorite ice cream. Surprisingly we both fancy MINT CHOCOLATE CHIP! Yeay :D


4) Got blessing, approval, support from my bestfriends! :)


p/s: spending some quality time with your love one doesnt necessarily mean going out on a date or dinner at fancy restaurant. just a little tea break would do. though it sounds small but those little things count. Effort :)

                                

                 my annoying supplement ;)            and                  my annoying self --'

timeaftertime#nowplaying

Takut VS Benci

Takut dan benci

dua perkara berbeza.

Contoh takut lipas

means kalau ada lipas

kau takut

Benci lipas

nak dengar nama pun tak suka

binatang tu lg lah

Jangan buat orang benci

benci kat kau

nanti bila org sebut nama kau

ada yang menyampah

tak nak dengar

kalau dah benci

jangan kan nama

 tempat kau jejak pun

tak ingin nak lalu

kalau tak nak dibenci

hormat.

p/s: Hatred is such a strong emotion. Dont make people hate you.

thriftshop #nowplaying

Name it yourself

I'm not the love guru type of person who deserved to write this post but on behalf of my friend who just not so recently got out from a relationship but the "ship" they're having is quite complicated that I have to console my friend and i think this post made sense just to help if anyone out there having the same issues/whatever that might related.

okay that makes quite an introduction. 

Back to topic. 

A very good friend of mine had this relationship with this guy and I'm beyond happy for her cse she's finally have someone to look after her but things didnt go so well between them that I wanna see her happy but if she didnt I cant do much. So I said I'll support her whatever decision she made which she regret it now. I'm kinda of guilty. She dumped him.

and now that guy is having a relationship with another girl (which is completely fine they even put it on facebook) and that my dear friend having a heartbreak. 

That guy must have been sending mixed/wrong signals to my friend, cse they're still texting and wake each other up for subuh prayer (which is really sweet) but then here goes the breaking news.

She dumped him. (okay i mentioned that twice)

which made sense to me if that guy wanna revenge or making her into him again and suddenly having relationship with another women. 

Before their break up, she said to me that she has no feeling for this guy which now I think thats a bull. That was her first real relationship and of course she's a lil bit scared to open up cse she didnt know if its real or not.

I do understand that. Really. Cse i'm living it now. 

But people appreciate something when its gone.

Now that he's gone (i mean in relationship with someone) and she feels like she can never win this guy again cse he's with someone else. and the fact that guy was over her when she just realized how real her feeling for this guy contributes to heartbreak she's having.

I cant talk much cse its no one's fault. Okay maybe that guy sent wrong signals and my friend took it seriously. But at the first place he got dumped. and he's hurt. His ego was hurt. Do you know how much that hurts? Very much.

and you cant really blame him on what he did to you (i mean my friend). 

I kinda lost my dearest once and I cant barely live for that temporary moment and when I had the second chance to have him back, I didnt waste it. And who knows that I appreciate him more than I did before. 

I hope that will teach her not to let the chance she has wasted, instead appreciate it like there's no second chance. 

p/s: Mistakes are mistakes if you repeat them.

theonlyexception #nowplaying

Have you?

Have you ever laid on your bed at night, and just cried? Cried because you're ugly. Because you're not good enough. You counted all your flaws from head to toe, to punish and feel worse about yourself. Cried because the comments people blurt out, actually hurt your feelings. Cried because your family is dysfunctional. You don't want to be a burden, so you bottled it all up. Around people, you're the happiest ray of sun shine. But nobody knows, that at night when you're alone, you break down and just cry.

:l

I took this from your blog. I get how you feel. I really do. I feel the same. I did cry at night. Cuddling in my blankie and cry. Silence cry hurts. we wanna cry but we cant make it obvious cse we dont want people to know that we cry. The fact that the tears drop breaks my ego so yeah. 

R; 

aku rindu kau.

teramat.

withme #nowplaying

FEW HEADS UP

hello guys out there. its been a while since my last post. not gonna make excuses such i'm busy, i have no time, i have nothing to write bla bla bla.. the truth is i'm not consistent. i got distracted easily and most of the time i'm being lazy. so here goes the few heads up :

i) i'm in fourth semester which suppose to be my last semester but I extend my final year project so i have another semester.

ii) i bought two cactus, one is for me and one for my friend but for the time being i took care of both but recently my friend's cactus was broken as it fell from fourth floor(my room).

iii) SUKFAC(sukan fakulti) is just around the corner so i have training everynight 8-10  (usually i came at 8.30 *earliest* and 9.15 *latest*) and after that i went to dinner and for sure i'm exhausted then i go to sleep and sometimes i skip classes. *shhhhhh*

iv) my faculty dinner is next week (friday) and up till today i havent decide what to wear yet and the theme is masquerade and if you have any idea or suggestion pls inform me i need to decide by weekends!

and i think thats all for now cse i have two to three entry to be made but under different title so i'm gonna end this now so that i have more time to write new one. and btw i have another blog which will be general about life and stuff, nothing personal like this one. okay i'm crapping. bye.